We Found the Jesus Christ Formula

theFutonPoncho staff have been scurrying in feverish preparation for the events surrounding the Chicago Cubs Home Opener, so please excuse the neglect. We’ll be back sometime next week. In the meantime, we thought it was important to let you know that we’ve discovered the Jesus Christ Formula, and thought you might like it too. Here’s [...]

Ritalin and Aderall lead to Harder Drugs

Picture Dennis Hopper in the scene from the Quentin Tarantino movie True Romance,” yea, it’s a fact, hey… now I’m quoting history here…”
Wasn’t it a few years back we were all hearing how Marijuana and alcohol use leads to harder drugs? –and by harder drugs it was usually understood

they meant heroin? Er wait, not [...]

Prison Terms for Eye Exams

theFutonPoncho may be gear to wear when your head is in the air, but it might also be something you put on to shield you from the outrageousness of everyday life in America. Everywhere you turn, laws are being enacted to “protect us” from the outside world. Has anyone thought to take into account how [...]

Elliot Spitzer Naked Pictures

All you need to do is see the 1996 movie The People vs. Larry Flynt where Woody Harrelson plays Hustler Magazines Boss Larry Claxton Flynt Jr. and you’ll understand why Larry is probably hands down one of the best examples of a true fit for an all time futonponcho award. Most people know that Larry [...]

Businessman Sues for Lapdance Injury

Oh Baby -thank you Stephen Chang. You just helped us identify another possible recipient for theFutonPoncho award! Mr. Chang was at Hot Lap Dance Club near Madison Square Garden when the stripper swiveled and smacked him in the face with the heel of her shoe. The Associated Press contacted the manager of the Hot Lap [...]

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